Theory

The Second Person

Jan 9, 2026 · 5 min read · Theory

Not a lot of stories use the second person singular perspective. Fewer use the second person plural. But this is the primary perspective of dungeon-delving modules, Chtulhian investigations, and space-faring adventures. Few adventures within Dungeon Magazine's comes with boxtext, and most of this boxtext comes at the …

Scot Hexes

Jul 19, 2025 · 3 min read · Blorb Cartography Theory

This is a response to Robgoblin's post on hex maps . It should have been an email, but Robgoblin has no contact details on the blog. Our cartographic goblin argues that a six-mile containing one settlement doesn't map to Middle Ages European fantasy settings, as any six-mile area would contain more than a single …

Vampires Speak Wallachian

Jun 11, 2025 · 1 min read · Prattle Theory White Wolf

The Blade films portrayed a vampire language, which makes no sense. Why spend another night with some bald twat memorizing cases when you could be in a club getting your teeth wet? Why would vampires develop and sustain a vampire language when they could speak Wallachian? Vampire: the Masquerade made no direct use of …

Roll for Charisma

May 19, 2025 · 1 min read · Theory

RPGs should have a 'social stat' to roll, not because you should always roll for social interactions, but because you sometimes must roll for social interactions. I acknowledge all counterarguments: This is a ROLE playing game. It's fun. We need to know how that player bribes the guard - rolling dice does not provide a …

No Class System is a Good System

Apr 1, 2025 · 6 min read · Theory

Every RPG class system is bad, but before I tell you what you should want, let me tell you about you. Or rather, let me say whom I want to speak with. I'm not writing for people who enjoy class systems, so much as for people who want to sit above it all, with an ineffable air of enlightenment, saying 'everything is …

Airtime over Balance

Feb 27, 2025 · 2 min read · Theory

Game designers talk about balancing powers far more than airtime. In fact, I've not heard anything about balancing airtime in some years. Balancing power restricts stories. We'd have to class Buffy the Vampire Slayer as 'unbalanced', even if all characters receive equal airtime in an episode, with equal decision-making …

Tactical Systems are Tacky

Jan 29, 2025 · 6 min read · Theory

A vision came to me of a perfectly tactical RPG system, and then I realized it was worthless, because tactical RPGs are tacky. This perfectly tactical system could be memorized in minutes, and let you play without any board or counters. Skilled players would do well, unskilled players would do badly. Players would …

Why Jaquays?

Jan 25, 2025 · 3 min read · Theory Blorb

Linear dungeons, where players see room 1, then room 2, all in order, can feel constraining. Dungeon: any location in an RPG scenario with details of opportunity and danger. Jaquaysing: to make a dungeon non-linear, so players must select which paths their characters take. The 'how' falls directly out of the in-world …

Shallow System Excuses

Jan 6, 2025 · 2 min read · Prattle Theory

The RPG scene has suffered for too long under its assumption that every positive feature in a system (realism, choices, fancy-looking hats) must imply more work to understand the system, and more time to resolve every action. (easy but nonsensical) (realistic but Maths) …

The Beauty of the World of Darkness System

Dec 8, 2024 · 4 min read · Theory White Wolf

The classic World of Darkness system has some impressive features. System Summary Add the character's Attribute + Ability, And roll that number of D10's. Each die which meets the difficulty number (default: 6) means one 'success'. Bust in the Door! Strength 3 + Crafts 3 = 6 Roll 6D10 (difficulty 7): 7, 4, 4, 3, 1, 6. …